Have I done enough?

On my rest day at the beginning of Week 28 and, therefore, Day 1 of the taper, I've been mulling over the training programme and have even dug out the Don Fink training book to go back over how things have been. With 3 weeks to go, Ironman never leaves my waking (or sleeping) thoughts and I'm swaying between being overcome with excitement and a desire to just get on with it and the other waves of sickness that wash around in my tummy every time I think about the task ahead.

I doubt anyone ever goes into a race feeling the preparation has been perfect. The one thing I can say is that I've been consistent and committed to what my training programme says week in, week out, with the slight exception of the swim which has been harder with all the lakes shut. Swimming 3500m in a pool on a regular basis, especially when your pool is an 18m one, is not exactly motivation fodder. But, otherwise I have generally felt pleased with what I've done. So, in my last peak week of the plan, I was gutted to not do a really long ride. It happened for reasons beyond my control and even though I know that 'life happens', it's thrown me into a bit of a spin about whether it's that that's going to make or break my race. Of course it isn't. 1 session out of 15 months is not end of the world and the day after a 3-hour run but I can't help now feeling I don't deserve the taper. What can I say - I'm too hard on myself about everything I do and Ironman was certainly never going to change that.

But, having got that off my chest, the next 3 weeks are now about looking forward, making plans, lists, sleeping, eating and hydrating well and keeping the fitness ticking over and sharp while also not risking any last-minute mishaps. I very nearly broke that rule on day 1 tonight by being tempted to swim but then I realised that I've not skipped a rest day all this time so why start now when I'm supposed to be easing back?! So, have a tummy full of fajitas (launching the Mexican theme), am serving myself a deadline of finishing this before 9.30 and then I'm off to rub Badger Balm on the temples and sleep before training early doors. Despite the taper, I still have to do 12 hours 45 this week so it's no picnic!

Before I sign off, wanted just to capture some stuff from Don Fink (loving re-reading all the motivational stuff in there) and his 4 phases of why Ironman?:
1. Non-belief and the first thought when you see IM on TV or learn the exact distances (2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike and a marathon back to back and within 17 hours) and you say "that's impossible".
2. Realisation when you see individual athletes and their heroic struggles to the finish and their sense of pride and accomplishment. Suddenly the impossible starts to become possible.
3. Curiosity. You start asking questions - why do people do this? What motivates them? How do they do it? How do they train?
4. The Dream. You start to ask yourself the question - I wonder if I could ever do it? I wonder if I could ever be an Ironman?

Once you ask yourself question 4, you are beyond the point of no return!

I know there are lots of variables on an Ironman - mechanical breakdown, brutal weather, nutrition mistakes, stomach rebellion to name but a few and I was gutted to hear about a Brit who pulled out of Ironman Florida last weekend due to unforeseen pelvic pain - but all I can do now is wait and hope that Lady Luck smiles on me a bit.

Right, have missed my 9.30 deadline. Eek! Goodnight!